I think I can speak for most of the christians when I say that in our lives there are moments or even stages where we are not so sure about our faith anymore. The enemy always try to destroy our faith in Jesus, that we know.
And for the first time in my life, a few months ago the enemy brought me to the point where all the beliefs I had until now was shaken to the ground. I couldn't trust God anymore. I'm not here to tell you what happened exactly because that's not my point. I want you guys to reflect this on your lives... The methods of the enemy may be many but never new. And the lies they want to plant into us are always the same: "God has no power.", "Why would you believe in Jesus?", "You are alone.", "Your voice never reach God’s ears.", "You are not worthy.", "God doesn't care for/about you.", "Does He even exist?", and so on... What tricks are they using on you so that you have troubles to hold on to your faith? I had troubles trusting God again, I didn't know what to do. I asked God, even yelled at Him, begged to give me an explanation, but He remained silent. Then again, I knew God doesn't owe me any explanations or anything... so I went silent for a long time, too... until I asked myself the question "why do I believe?". Because of any proof? Because someone told me so? Because it's easy or comfy? I think many of you will have answers right now popping out in your minds... But none of them was enough for me at that point. Because the enemy shook the fundament, I had no answer. But I came too far in my life that at least I knew that No-God means No-life. So, there was only one question left: "What now?" And who knows maybe some of you are exactly at the same situation right now. And here is the answer I have found, which in the end I believe the Holy Spirit whispered into my heart: When you think you can believe no more, HAVE COURAGE TO BELIEF ANYWAY! We live in a time where you sure could say that it's very brave to be a believer. And I believe that's what God wanted to tell me: That He sees us as one courageous folk, of whom He is very proud of. It's not like everything was restored with just a finger flip, but I made that significant prayer that turned the tables on the enemies. I prayed for courage to have faith again and proclaimed every time doubt creeped in, that I believe in the Way, the Truth and the Life. I prayed that God may restore and multiply the faith that the enemy had stolen from me. And little by little He did... I know this year has been very... difficult indeed... and I believe many are just exhausted and start to question more and more things. There's so much chaos and confusion. My mom feels like as if the whole world is playing theatre and I feel it's more like a circus. But hey... I want to encourage you by saying "Have courage!" ... Have courage and "turn your eyes upon Jesus, look full in His wonderful face. And the things on earth will grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace". And who knows? Maybe it's just a time in our lives where God wants to ask you and me if we would still choose Him no matter what may come from now on. I used to have the habit to renew that decision every morning by saying "Good morning Jesus, today also, I choose to be entirely yours". For we human tend to be strangely forgetful. Also, one good thing I have learned in this pandemic: I understood what "sound mind" means, as in [2.Tim.1:7] "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind". I was always confused about that word. I was like "Yeaaah! Spirit of poweeeer! Yeaaah! And of loooove! Yeaaah! And of sound miiiin...d... ? Eh? What does that mean?" I wondered. But wow lol we need that spirit of sound mind, indeed. Fear can make you lose your mind easily. Especially in a chaotic time like this. But thank God, God is a God of order. Well... I pray that we will stand as the courageous folk, of whom our Father in heaven is so proud of and that we may have rest in the shadow of His wings. May the peace of the Lord which surpasses all understanding overflow you and guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Amen. |
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